


He Could Only Watch Her Leave

by Ariesne



Category: C-Pop, K-pop, Real Person Fiction, Zhang Liyin - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Celebrities, Chinese Character, F/M, Korean Characters, Long-Distance Relationship, Morning After, Stardom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-18
Updated: 2018-11-18
Packaged: 2019-08-25 17:06:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16664791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ariesne/pseuds/Ariesne
Summary: Somehow, even eight months into their relationship, Donghae and Liyin have managed to keep their relationship from being known by the media. Although they lived in separate countries, they have always made time for each other, no matter the career risks. But at this eight-month mark, maybe it was time to take this relationship to the next step...





	He Could Only Watch Her Leave

**Author's Note:**

> I started this back in 2011. It was lying dormant for seven years, but I came across it in my files recently and decided to finish it. Hopefully, there isn't a noticeable difference in writing tones. Enjoy.

"When's your flight?"

"Five o'clock."

It was just past one in the afternoon.

 _Do you have to go?_ That was his next question. But from watching her, he didn't need to hear her answer to know what it was. She packed her suitcase with a sense of finality as if the decision was made long ago, and he had no influence over the matter. Which was the truth. His first question had been redundant. She had told him of this trip two months ago, a couple weeks after their six-month anniversary. Then it was only a casual mention, but now he could only watch her leave.

He leaned back on her bed - _their_ bed for the past three weeks - and tried to appear nonchalant towards her as she packed. There was the blue sweater he had gotten her for their first month anniversary, the pink dress shirt she wore to their first evening date, the pair of underwear he nearly ripped the first time they slept together, the bra she bought only a week ago, and the set of lingerie he gave her when he had moved in. He watched as all these items transferred from the drawers to the suitcase, and a part of him wanted to ask, _why do you need to bring the lingerie with you?_ But he didn't because there was nothing to accuse her of.

At least, that's what all their friends said. Sure, she talked about her talent manager all the time, but it meant nothing. Their relationship was merely a working relationship, nothing beyond co-workers, nothing beyond friends. His eyes lifted from the lingerie to search her face. It was the same expression he always knew - quiet and subdued, but always thoughtful. It was also the same Liyin he always knew: long black hair, brown eyes, and full lips. When he turned back to the suitcase, the lingerie was already buried by layers of t-shirts.

She glanced at him. "It's only for three months. I'll be just a phone call away."

He didn't say anything, but stood and walked towards her, wrapping his arms around her from behind. Ducking his head, he inhaled her scent, a natural perfume of vanilla, kiwis and jasmine. He moved her hair aside to gain better access to her neck. Then softly, he began a trail of light kisses down from her ear to her shoulder, treasuring every inch of bare skin that lay beneath his lips.

"Donghae," she whispered, "not now."

She wanted to turn in his arms but he held her still and kept her in front of him. He held her as long as he could, enjoying the body warmth they were sharing in the moment before she finally pulled away from him. Cold air rushed in between their bodies, and he tried not to pull her back towards him.

"Not now," she repeated. "I need to pack. My flight is in a couple of hours."

He reluctantly let her go, letting her twist around to face him.

"I'll be back before you know it," she assured him.

He reached up and pushed the bangs from her face, taking in all her features, as if trying to memorize her face. Mentally, he picked it apart. Was it the round almond eyes that were his favourite feature, or the soft lips that always seemed to lure him in?

"I'm going to miss my flight," Liyin said. With a slightly exasperated expression, she leaned her face into his hand as she looked up at him. "I can't miss this flight."

He ignored her as his hands travelled from holding her head to moving across her shoulders, fingers tracing the bra straps that were there. He cursed them in his mind, wishing he could pull them down and repeat his actions from this morning.

"Donghae," she warned.

He felt so blatantly male for realizing this, but _her breasts_ , he decided, were his favourite feature. They were covered now, by a pink and black bra she put on just moments ago, but he could still remember how they looked like in his hands hours before. Full and heavy, with tiny freckles scattered across her light brown nipples. He had played with them while he went down her torso, and he had kissed them when they swung above him during intercourse. He could spend an entire day just on her breasts.

"Donghae," Liyin's tone was firmer now. She really couldn't miss this flight.

He dragged his eyes up and away from her breasts and finally returned her gaze. "I'm going to miss you."

Liyin's eyes softened. "I'm going to miss you too."

They have been dating for eight months now. It was a challenge at first when they didn't live in the same country and they were both singers with busy careers, but they made it work. The strange part of it all was that the media had still not caught on. Somehow, they have managed to keep their relationship under wraps. They preferred it that way, but as he watched her now, he realized that he couldn't let her go without knowing that she was officially his. _You're mine, right?_ It was just one little checkbox that would help him feel more comfortable in their goodbye's if it was filled in.

"Liyin," he started, watching her as she returned to her packing.

"Yes?"

"When you are back, let's make this official."

She was in the midst of reorganizing the toiletries in her luggage when she stopped to turn him. "This?"

He tried not to let her reaction bother him as he leaned back into the bed, propping himself up by only his arms. His closest friends who knew about this relationship had teased him before about him dating Liyin was dating above his level, but he didn't think it was true. _It wasn't true._ Sure, there were times where he thought it seemed like she was rushing to return home to Beijing like she was now, but they've been together for eight months. They have flown red-eye flights for the sole reason of seeing each other; they have rescheduled public appearances to better synchronize their calendars; and, last but not least, they have met each other's families at Lunar New Year. There was no other next step.

He pushed his insecurities away. "Us," he said, lifting his head slightly to appear more confident. "Me and you."

Liyin dropped the shampoo bottle she was holding and fully turned to face him. Her eyebrows were raised, but her eyes were bemused. "Us," she repeated. "Make us official?"

His shoulders tensed at her response and he adjusted his arms on the bed, nervously shifting his weight on the mattress. "We've been dating for eight months. We've met each other's parents. Some of our fans even know about us already. I think it's time we let the public know."

"The public doesn't need to know," she answered swiftly, returning to her suitcase. "We don't owe them anything."

He looked away, turning to the view of Han River outside the window. Going official in the public's eye was not something he had thought of suddenly. He had been mulling over this question for weeks. There might be no other next step, but judging from Liyin's reaction, maybe this was just bad timing.

Liyin was almost done her packing. He watched as she pulled on her short black skirt, a pair of tall black socks, and then a long white button-down shirt. Eyelashes were then curled, mascara was swiped on, and lip balm was dabbed onto her lips. Finally, she slipped into a tan coloured trenchcoat and a pair of black oxford shoes. He watched her pack the last of her makeup items and bend to lock her suitcase. The sound of the lock clicking together echoed in the room.

It was at that moment when he wondered if she was going to leave without saying more.

But when she made the move to pull herself out of the room, her hand resting on the handle of her suitcase, she seemed to recall his comment and stopped to turn to him.

They looked at each other. He was still resting on the bed, unclothed save for his boxers, while she stood just in front of him, fully dressed and ready to leave. His eyes trailed over her stance, admiring her appearance despite the tension. Her eyes conveyed nothing and her expression was mild, but her shoulders were dropped, as if already tired from the discussion.

She sighed. "Donghae, when I am back, we can have this conversation. I am going to miss my flight."

He looked away again, returning his gaze towards the window. "Fine." His response came out more curtly than he intended it to be. This was just bad timing. She always ran off back to Beijing in a hurry, he knew this. Yet in his euphoria, from their three consecutive weeks of spending time together, he had selfishly - _so selfishly_ \- wanted more.

She sighed again. "Donghae," she said softly, calling for his attention.

He turned back to her at his name. Her expression was gentle now, eyes expressive and tender. She had let go of the luggage handle and walked towards him. Her knees nudged his legs apart so she stood directly between them. She reached up to cradle his face in her hands, pushing his head slightly towards her so it rested between her breasts.

This time, this view was not enough. He stood from the bed to stand with her, reversing the gesture to press her head against his chest, so he could hold her properly. Her weight comforted him, even if her lack of an answer hurt him.

"Three months from now, we can have this conversation," Liyin said quietly, tilting her head to look at him.

"I love you, you know," It was not the first time he had spoken these words to her. He wanted more now, not three months from now.

Though her expression turned slightly weary at his three words, her eyes softened and her lips lifted into a smile. "I know." She got up on her toes and tilted her head back to kiss him. "I love you too," she whispered against his lips.

He barely had the time to catch her mouth against his when she had already dropped back to her heels and turned back to her luggage. Like only just moments before, he felt a whoosh of cold air rush across his bare skin as her body heat left his. While still standing by the bed, he watched as she wheeled her suitcase from the bedroom. Her oxford shoes clicked on the wooden floors, the clicks sounding more and more distant as she headed toward the front door of their apartment.

"Donghae," she called from afar.

He rubbed his face tiredly. He should be used to her leaving by now. Dragging a hand through his hair, he finally moved from his spot to leave the bedroom and towards the apartment front door, rolling his shoulders to appear to more relaxed. He didn't get an immediate response, but it stung all the same.

He stopped a couple of steps from her, his eyes searching hers as he waited cautiously for her to react. This felt more difficult than all their previous goodbye's. It felt heavier as if he had placed a weight on their relationship. _A deadline._

Smiling wistfully, she reached towards him for an embrace.

Instinctively, his arms circled her, his eyes closed as he breathed in her perfume, a feminine smell mixed with her natural scent. He buried his face into her hair and tried to inhale the smell of her shampoo into his memories. "I'm going to miss you," he murmured.

"And I'll miss you."

When he felt her arms loosen around him, his arms tightened around her in response so he could breathe in her scent once more. He tried to memorize the way she felt in his arms, the way they always seemed to fit perfectly with each other. They were each other's perfect height. He turned his head slightly to press a kiss against her forehead, wishing they had a few more hours.

"Donghae." Though her voice was quiet, her tone was urgent.

Right, her flight. Reluctantly, he released her and watched her turn to gather her bags. He forced a small smile, wordlessly watching as she unlocked the front door and opened it to the hallway. _Tap, tap, tap,_ her shoes clicked against the wooden floor in her last steps out of the apartment.

"I'll message you when I get to the airport."

He nodded.

Then with that, she turned and left.

Donghae watched as the door swung behind her, only flinching slightly as the click of the door closing echoed through the apartment.

It would be three months before she would open this door again.


End file.
